Johnson’s London Dictionary: Cycle Lane

CYCLE LANE (n.) A  throughfare to assist the perambulation by those whose countenance carries a self-satisfied smirk as they pass stationary vehicles

Dr. Johnson’s London Dictionary for publick consumption in the twenty-first century avail yourself on Twitter @JohnsonsLondon

The London Grill: Andy Scott

We challenge our contributors to reply to ten devilishly probing questions about their London and we don’t take “Sorry Gov” for an answer. Everyone sitting in the hot seat they will face the same questions ranging from their favourite way to spend a day out in the capital to their most hated building on London’s skyline to find out what Londoners really think about their city. The questions are the same but the answers vary wildly.

Born and raised in Barnes, SW London, I started in the print industry back in 1982, retrained as a journalist in the mid-1990s doing gig reviews for the Birmingham Post & Mail, freelancing for BBC MOTD magazine and BBC Radio 5. I then worked on a print & paper sector magazine and spent 6 years with Haymarket Publishing, travelling all over Europe and USA & Canada. I formed my own PR Consultancy in 2006, and have been dealing with clients across a vast array of sectors, most latterly as PR & Communications for London Taxi PR, promoting and organising media campaigns on behalf of the London Taxi profession.

I’ve written 2 books. London’s Loveable Villain is about my great uncle, Chick Cocky Knight. Son of a London Taxi driver, one of the first British Wrestlers on TV in 1938, he was also the only British sportsperson to be a triple lifesaver.

Tales of a Page tells the first part of my late father’s working life as a Page at London’s Dorchester Hotel in the early 1950s.

What’s your secret London tip?

I’ve walked 8 London Bridges in a day, from Battersea upwards, across and back and along the Thames. It’s a fascinating Thameside combination of views, architecture and scenery. Well worth doing if you have the time and see how The Thames snakes through London and the architecture changes. Look up and look around. It’s amazing what you will see.

What’s your secret London place?

Mount Street Gardens off Mount Street in Mayfair and close to the Church of the Immaculate Conception. A tranquil and serene place where you can sit and ponder as the world passes by. It has its own unique history too, being the site of a former burial ground and workhouse.

What’s your biggest gripe about London?

Too many people all in a rush to get nowhere fast, be they on foot, bike or car!

What’s your favourite building?

Stationers Hall on Ava Maria Lane. A wonderful building steeped in history that I have been fortunate enough to visit and dine in on many occasions as a Liveryman and Freeman of the City of London. Its library is also one of the best in terms of ancient and rare manuscripts.

What’s your most hated building?

City Hall, for far too many reasons. Having been a visitor on many occasions it irks me in so many ways. The design, the wastage of space, the people, I could go on but I won’t!

What’s the best view in London?

I’m lucky enough to have been inside Tower Bridge, and the views from the top, up and down the Thames are simply superb. An amazing piece of historic London architecture.

What’s your personal London landmark?

St. Peter’s Italian Church in Clerkenwell. Opened in 1863, as an apprentice in the print at Back Hill, I often used to pass by and wander in. It’s rightly described as one of the most beautiful churches in London. One visit and you will see why.

What’s London’s best film, book or documentary?

Film: The Long Good Friday. A classic depiction of pre-developed Docklands and the vision portrayed by Harold Shand (Bob Hoskins) of a thriving business area that would go on to host the Olympic Games in 2012 was the frighteningly realistic prediction of what was to come.

What’s your favourite restaurant?

Used to be (Pierre) Koffmann’s in Knightsbridge, now sadly closed. I’d have to say for food, service, ambience and value The Goring is now a personal favourite.

How would you spend your ideal day off in London?

Breakfast at Pellicci’s in Bethnal Green, followed by a visit to Wapping and the fabulous old pubs of Turner’s Old Star and Captain Kidd. Pie and Mash at G. Kelly’s on the Roman Road, I’d then head to St. Katherine’s Dock for drinks and people watching, a cigar in C.Gars at Jermyn Street culminating with a meal at Sam’s Riverside Restaurant in Hammersmith and a Haymaker Cocktail, named in tribute to my great uncle Chick to round off the day whilst looking out over The Thames.

London in Quotations: Fran Lebowitz

London – a place you go to get bronchitis.

Fran Lebowitz, attributed, Dick Enberg’s Humorous Quotes for All Occasions

London Trivia: The Great Smog

On 5 December 1952, the Great Smog of 1952, formed by a sharp cold snap, lack of wind and a combination of industrial and domestic smoke, engulfed London for four days, resulting in the death of upwards of 12,000 people.

On 5 December 1766 thirty-six-year-old James Christie held his first auction sale in London

Thief-Taker General Jonathan Wild sent more than 120 men to the gallows but was hanged at Tyburn for running gangs of thieves

When Camden’s Egyptian style cigarette factory opened in 1927 the road was filled with sand and opera singers performed Aida

In 1907 William Whiteley was shot dead in his Bayswater store by a young man claiming to be his illegitimate son

When Napoleon was thinking of invading England his failed attempt was mocked by an unusual ale house sign: ‘My Arse in a Bandbox’

The Grapes, Limehouse was the inspiration for Charles Dickens’ ‘Six Jolly Fellowship Porters’ in Our Mutual Friend

On 5 December 1863 at Freemasons Arms, Great Queen Street modern footy was codified, Freemasons Arms, Long Acre displays old football boots

Queen Victoria’s husband, Albert, saved the Oval cricket ground from closure only six years after it opened, desperate for funds they had considered adding poultry shows to the venue’s activities

Before CrossRail was named the Elizabeth line, Belsize Park was the only part of the London Underground to use a Z in its name

Wall’s Sausages used to be located at 113 Jermyn Street, where the meat for their products was ground by a donkey operating a treadmill

‘Hobson’s Choice’ comes from the livery stable owner Thomas Hobson who would drive from Cambridge to the Bull Inn, Bishopsgate Street

CabbieBlog-cab.gifTrivial Matter: London in 140 characters is taken from the daily Twitter feed @cabbieblog.
A guide to the symbols used here and source material can be found on the Trivial Matter page.

Test Your Knowledge: December

As you might have expected, this month’s quiz has a festive theme. As before the correct answer will turn green when it’s clicked upon and expanded to give more information. The incorrect answers will turn red giving the correct explanation.

1. The first Christmas card was invented in London by Sir Henry Cole in 1843. What was the picture on it?
A family drinking wine
CORRECT Illustrated by John Callcott the central picture showed three generations of a family raising a toast to the card’s recipient, on either side were scenes of charity, with food and clothing being given to the poor.
A robin singing
WRONG Illustrated by John Callcott the central picture showed three generations of a family raising a toast to the card’s recipient, on either side were scenes of charity, with food and clothing being given to the poor.
A bobby apprehending a pickpocket
WRONG Illustrated by John Callcott the central picture showed three generations of a family raising a toast to the card’s recipient, on either side were scenes of charity, with food and clothing being given to the poor.
2. The demo of The Pogues’ Fairytale of New York was recorded in one London studio, the final cut in another London studio, and the orchestra in a third. Which of these studios had nothing to do with the song?
Abbey Road Studios in St John’s Wood
WRONG In the UK, “Fairytale of New York” is the most-played Christmas song of the 21st century. Stiff Records had a difficult time getting it published using these London studios Elephant; Sarm West; AIR; Abbey Road; RAK Studios, but NOT Eel Pie Studio.
Eel pie studio in Twickenham
CORRECTIn the UK, “Fairytale of New York” is the most-played Christmas song of the 21st century. Stiff Records had a difficult time getting it published using these London studios Elephant; Sarm West; AIR; Abbey Road; RAK Studios, but NOT Eel Pie Studio.
RAK Studios in St John’s Wood
WRONG In the UK, “Fairytale of New York” is the most-played Christmas song of the 21st century. Stiff Records had a difficult time getting it published using these London studios Elephant; Sarm West; AIR; Abbey Road; RAK Studios, but NOT Eel Pie Studio.
3. In A Christmas Carol, which form of poultry does Scrooge send a young lad off to fetch?
Turkey
CORRECT Scrooge asks if the big prize turkey has been sold at the poulterer’s shop. The boy tells him it is still there. Planning to give the turkey to Bob Cratchit, Scrooge orders the boy to have the man bring the turkey to his home, and if he does it in less than five minutes, he’ll give him a half-crown.
Chicken
WRONG Scrooge asks if the big prize turkey has been sold at the poulterer’s shop. The boy tells him it is still there. Planning to give the turkey to Bob Cratchit, Scrooge orders the boy to have the man bring the turkey to his home, and if he does it in less than five minutes, he’ll give him a half-crown.
Goose
WRONG Scrooge asks if the big prize turkey has been sold at the poulterer’s shop. The boy tells him it is still there. Planning to give the turkey to Bob Cratchit, Scrooge orders the boy to have the man bring the turkey to his home, and if he does it in less than five minutes, he’ll give him a half-crown.
4. In festive musical The Ghosts of Oxford Street, who features as an all-singing, all-dancing Harry Gordon Selfridge?
Tom Jones
CORRECT Malcolm McLaren charts the extraordinary history of London’s famous shopping street in a musical film that features Sir Tom Jones, Sinead O’Connor, The Pogues, and Kirsty MacColl. Perversely Tom Jones played the lead of Harry Gordon Selfridge.
Malcolm McLaren
WRONG Malcolm McLaren charts the extraordinary history of London’s famous shopping street in a musical film that features Sir Tom Jones, Sinead O’Connor, The Pogues, and Kirsty MacColl. Perversely Tom Jones played the lead of Harry Gordon Selfridge.
Brian Blessed
WRONG Malcolm McLaren charts the extraordinary history of London’s famous shopping street in a musical film that features Sir Tom Jones, Sinead O’Connor, The Pogues, and Kirsty MacColl. Perversely Tom Jones played the lead of Harry Gordon Selfridge.
5. Which of these does NOT normally open in London on Christmas Day?
Fortnum & Mason
CORRECT Believe it or not, Ripley’s normally opens on Christmas Day. Hardly surprising for their employees Fortnum & Mason keep their door firmly closed.
St Paul’s Cathedral
WRONG Believe it or not, Ripley’s normally opens on Christmas Day. Hardly surprising for their employees Fortnum & Mason keep their door firmly closed.
Ripley’s Believe It Or Not?
WRONG Believe it or not, Ripley’s normally opens on Christmas Day. Hardly surprising for their employees Fortnum & Mason keep their door firmly closed.
6. The Trafalgar Square tree has been donated every Christmas since 1947 by which city?
Reykjavik
WRONG The Trafalgar Square Christmas tree is a Christmas tree donated to the people of Britain by the city of Oslo. The first Tree was cut down by Mons Urangsvåg in 1942 during a raid on the Norwegian Island called Hisøy. Hisøy Island is located on the west coast between Bergen and Haugesund. After it was cut down, the tree was then transported to England where The Norwegian King was hiding, and given to him as a gift.
Oslo
CORRECT The Trafalgar Square Christmas tree is a Christmas tree donated to the people of Britain by the city of Oslo. The first Tree was cut down by Mons Urangsvåg in 1942 during a raid on the Norwegian Island called Hisøy. Hisøy Island is located on the west coast between Bergen and Haugesund. After it was cut down, the tree was then transported to England where The Norwegian King was hiding, and given to him as a gift.
Stockholm
WRONG The Trafalgar Square Christmas tree is a Christmas tree donated to the people of Britain by the city of Oslo. The first Tree was cut down by Mons Urangsvåg in 1942 during a raid on the Norwegian Island called Hisøy. Hisøy Island is located on the west coast between Bergen and Haugesund. After it was cut down, the tree was then transported to England where The Norwegian King was hiding, and given to him as a gift.
7. Which of these is NOT a Christmas Day extract from Samuel Pepy’s diary?
“…taking occasion from some fault in the meat to complain of my maid’s sluttery, my wife and I fell out…”
WRONG While Pepys wrote his diary for own his consumption, Roy Wood and Wizzard in 1973 had no such reservations and inflicted us with “I wish it could be Christmas every day” forevermore.
“Captain Cock came to us half-drunk…”
WRONG While Pepys wrote his diary for own his consumption, Roy Wood and Wizzard in 1973 had no such reservations and inflicted us with “I wish it could be Christmas every day” forevermore.
“For indeed, I wish it could be Christmas every day…”
CORRECT While Pepys wrote his diary for own his consumption, Roy Wood and Wizzard in 1973 had no such reservations and inflicted us with “I wish it could be Christmas every day” forevermore.
8. Noel Edmonds’s 1984 Christmas Day TV show was broadcast from the top of which lofty London landmark?
The Monument
WRONG For 90 minutes on 25 December 1984 “nothing less than one of the greatest communications projects ever put forward” as Noel modestly described proceedings from the top of the Post Office Tower, as it was then known. Featuring Rila Lenska and Dennis Waterman drinking a can of lager in Australia and the Krankies play host to the highest Christmas party on a jumbo jet flying over Britain.
Centre Point
WRONG For 90 minutes on 25 December 1984 “nothing less than one of the greatest communications projects ever put forward” as Noel modestly described proceedings from the top of the Post Office Tower, as it was then known. Featuring Rila Lenska and Dennis Waterman drinking a can of lager in Australia and the Krankies play host to the highest Christmas party on a jumbo jet flying over Britain.
The BT Tower
CORRECT For 90 minutes on 25 December 1984 “nothing less than one of the greatest communications projects ever put forward” as Noel modestly described proceedings from the top of the Post Office Tower, as it was then known. Featuring Rila Lenska and Dennis Waterman drinking a can of lager in Australia and the Krankies play host to the highest Christmas party on a jumbo jet flying over Britain.
9. In 1963 the switching on of Oxford Street’s Christmas lights was postponed. Why?
In tribute to the recently assassinated JFK
CORRECT The lighting up of London was postponed as a mark of respect to the recently assassinated John F Kennedy. And in 1989, the great switch on in Oxford Street bowed to the power of pop celebrity, waiting several weeks past its usual mid-November date for Kylie Minogue to make a window in her hectic schedule.
There was a major power cut in central London
WRONG The lighting up of London was postponed as a mark of respect to the recently assassinated John F Kennedy. And in 1989, the great switch on in Oxford Street bowed to the power of pop celebrity, waiting several weeks past its usual mid-November date for Kylie Minogue to make a window in her hectic schedule.
The Beatles cancelled an appearance at the last minute
WRONG The lighting up of London was postponed as a mark of respect to the recently assassinated John F Kennedy. And in 1989, the great switch on in Oxford Street bowed to the power of pop celebrity, waiting several weeks past its usual mid-November date for Kylie Minogue to make a window in her hectic schedule.
10. In 2015 a box of six luxury Christmas crackers from Fortnum & Mason set you back £1,000. Which of these items was NOT inside?
Scarf
WRONG The cracker included that essential: a rose gold-plated heart tea infuser, plus a scarf and a tie, but no diamond earrings.
Diamond earrings
CORRECT The cracker included that essential: a rose gold-plated heart tea infuser, plus a scarf and a tie, but no diamond earrings.
Tie
WRONG The cracker included that essential: a rose gold-plated heart tea infuser, plus a scarf and a tie, but no diamond earrings.

Taxi Talk Without Tipping