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A Licensed Black London Cab Driver I share my London with you . . . The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

The London Grill: Dan Simpson

We challenge our contributors to reply to ten devilishly probing questions about their London and we don’t take “Sorry Gov” for an answer. Everyone sitting in the hot seat they will face the same questions ranging from their favourite way to spend a day out in the capital to their most hated building on London’s skyline to find out what Londoners think about their city. The questions are the same but the answers vary wildly.

Dan Simpson is a writer, facilitator, and creativity coach. An accomplished poet, he has been Poet-in-Residence at Glastonbury Festival, Waterloo Station, National Trust Stowe, Imperial College London, and St Albans Cathedral. His work has been featured at Southbank Centre, the Royal Academy of Arts, and on the BBC. In 2022 he created On the Cotton, a project pairing poets with London’s black cab drivers and writing poems about the historic trade. His other work can be found here.

What’s your secret London tip?

Don’t stare at your phone whilst travelling around. London is a city of architectural oddities, interesting pieces of history, and semi-hidden goings on all just there for the keen observer. I’d go so far as to say this even applies on the Underground – you never know who you might spot, or what stories you might overhear.

What’s your secret London place?

Postman’s Park. Though made a little more famous by the play and film Closer, every time I’ve visited it’s very quiet. It’s a little shrine dedicated to those who lost their lives saving others, tucked away near St Paul’s. A sombre place to reflect on the best of the human spirit – something that sometimes feels lacking in our city.

What’s your biggest gripe about London?

The seemingly never-ending knocking down of council estates and iconic places for expensive flats that force communities and local people out. That, and the cost of a pint.

What’s your favourite building?

The Natural History Museum – a Victorian cathedral to science and the natural world. Going inside and my eyes are drawn upwards, noticing the details of stone monkeys climbing the pillars, painted plant adorning the ceilings, the sheer volume of stuff from around the globe. As a building, it’s incredibly of its time, but the atmosphere is contemporary: understandable, given it’s also a research institution, and full of excited children discovering the wonders of nature!

What’s your most hated building?

The Old War Office (or The OWO, as it’s styled now). Every time I cycle past I cringe a bit at the tagline ‘The home of legends’. I can’t imagine how much it would cost to buy a place there, and who will be doing so – given the location in the heart of Westminster and political power.

What’s the best view in London?

Sky Garden. That it’s free – in this expensive city! – to go up 43 floors to look at the view is surely a mistake. Fantastic cocktails too – though those will set you back a few pounds.

What’s your personal London landmark?

Tower Bridge. During lockdowns, my partner and I (on our one legal outdoor activity per day) often jogged from her place in Stepney Green, over London Bridge, and back via Tower Bridge. We’d barely see a soul – a strange thing for the middle of a usually busy city, and a lockdown experience I’ll never forget. I also have a wonderful memory and photo of me crossing Tower Bridge – almost the halfway point – during the London Marathon.

What’s London’s best film, book or documentary?

Kraken, by China Miéville. A page-turning jaunt through the recognisable surface of London – and the weird mystical forces that are happening under the perception of the everyday. It’s a fun mash-up of London and the occult – and to me, speaks to the fact that London really works in ways most of us don’t consider.

What’s your favourite restaurant?

Mildred’s – the first one in Soho. One of the original and best dedicated vegetarian places, it felt like a treat as a veggie in the days before vegan food became available everywhere. I like that they don’t make that their selling point – they simply make excellent food (and cocktails!). They’ve quietly switched to a full vegan menu too, and I’ve never had a bad experience there. Shout out to Naifs in my area of Peckham too – it’s incredible.

How would you spend your ideal day off in London?

On a fresh and sunny Spring day, I’d start with a jog around Peckham Rye Common. Then onto my bike, off to the Tate Modern and a wander round wondering about the art. A quick dip into Borough Market for the free cheese samples before lunch at Mildred’s Soho. Then a pedal over to Cambridge Circus and Orc’s Nest to look at boardgames – probably via the huge Brewdog for a beer. Then on to Brick Lane to look at the graffiti and pick up a bag of bagels (Beigel Bake is the better of the two bakeries here!). Then the Old Hackney Baths for a dance before the Overground back to Peckham – stopping for a swift nightcap at Brick Brewery’s taproom.

On The Cotton, celebrating the 200th anniversary of the first licensed Hackney Cab service in London. This short film documents a project that saw seven Black Cab drivers and seven London-based poets co-create poetry that celebrates the iconic Black Cab, London’s cabbies, passengers, and the Knowledge. The film will be introduced by Dan Simpson, who pioneered the On The Cotton project, working in partnership with London Transport Museum. After the film, enjoy a poetry performance and a Q&A with some of the poets, cabbies, and filmmaker Bilal Bounit. Performers will include Duane Colman and Abstract Benna, Adam Gaunt, and Mick O’Flynn with a voiceover by Arji Manuelpillai. Poet Shirine Shah and former cabbie Les Simpson will join the Q&A. Black Cab drivers are eligible for a concession ticket price for this event: simply show your yellow or green badge on the door. Saturday 11th March 2023, tickets are available at The London Transport Museum.

London in Quotations: George Gissing

The type of man capable of success in London is more or less callous and cynical. If I had the training of boys, I would teach them to think of London as the last place where life can be lived worthily.

George Gissing (1857-1903)

London Trivia: A naturalist’s nightmare

On 5 March 1879 a coal porter found a wooden box in the Thames near Barnes Bridge. Inside was the remains of Miss Julia Thomas, murdered by her servant, Kate Webster who then disposed of the body by dismembering it, boiling the flesh off the bones, and throwing most of the remains into the Thames. Found guilty and hanged at Wandsworth Prison. In a twist of fate naturalist David Attenborough during building work found the missing skull of the victim.

On 5 March 1969 the Old Bailey’s most expensive hearing ended after 39-days when Ronnie and Reggie Kray were given 30 years’ for murder

During the Jack the Ripper investigation the police paid £100 for 2 tracker bloodhounds but they got lost and needed the Police to find them

The last wolf in the City of London is commemorated at the spot it was killed, where a wolf’s head forms the waterspout of the Aldgate pump

Fragrance Madeleine was trialled at Piccadilly station in 2001 to make the Tube more pleasant. Stopped after days people said they felt ill

The last male Prime Minister to wear a wedding ring in public was Harold Wilson, in 1976, in fact the last occupant of No 10 to regularly sport a wedding ring was Lady Thatcher

Starting in 1908 with a Perrier sign, it now costs £2 million a year to advertise your firm on a Piccadilly Circus neon sign

The Lamb in Lamb’s Conduit Street had etched glass partitions preventing wealthy drinkers having to watch common men drinking in next bar

On 5 March 1870 the first ever International Football match was England vs Scotland held at The Oval, the first of many England draws 1-1

In 1750 the first umbrella used by Jonas Hanway brought back from Persia. Cabbies fearful they’d lose their wet weather called him a Frenchman

Jack Dee once worked in the Ritz’s kitchen. One night he cooked a doorman dinner, got a 50p tip. Made him realise his life was in a mess

Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese pub off Fleet Street, built in 1667, has a famous resident – a dead parrot named Polly who swore in many languages

CabbieBlog-cab.gifTrivial Matter: London in 140 characters is taken from the daily Twitter feed @cabbieblog.
A guide to the symbols used here and source material can be found on the Trivial Matter page.

Previously Posted: Rear View Mirror

For those new to CabbieBlog or readers who are slightly forgetful, on Saturdays I’m republishing posts, many going back over a decade. Some will still be very relevant while others have become dated over time. Just think of this post as your weekend paper supplement.

Rear View Mirror (16.02.2010)

I bet you, like me thought the sole purpose of the iconic London Black Cab was to transport its driver and his passengers from point A to point B.

Well, how wrong can we be? I’ve had Batman and Robin getting changed in the back in preparation to go to a “Fools and Horses” fancy dress party, and girls constantly risk serious eye damage by applying mascara while in the back of my moving vehicle.

In an idle moment you might have Googled on the internet an “adult art movie” filmed in the back of a cab, while The Mail on Sunday in their You supplement regularly purports to interview stars in a weekly feature entitled In a taxi with…

London cabs are a great choice for city tours (well I should know) and what better place to use a London cab than Christchurch, not that rather gentile town on the south coast, but on the other side of the world, New Zealand.

Another company utilising our vehicles are Justsofilms who over the past two years have filmed dozens of musicians, performing in the back of a London licensed cab. Brian Wilson, Ryan Adams and the Doves are among the clips to be found on their site blackcabsessions. If you dig deep enough you can find a duo entitled The Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs playing while one wears a glittering cardboard box on his head, while being driven by a very embarrassed cabbie around London.

And as a footnote they make rather good wedding cars, just a few months ago at my daughter’s wedding a rather splendid white cab took us to the church.

Test Your Knowledge: March 2023

With ULEZ soon coming into force, the M25 is now the demarcation line between free and expensive driving, so how’s your knowledge about this iconic road? As before the correct answer will turn green when it’s clicked upon and expanded to give more information. The incorrect answers will turn red giving the correct explanation.

1. When was the M25 first planned?
1947
WRONG The Highways Development Survey drawn up by engineer Sir Charles Bressey and his consultant Sir Edwin Lutyens provided the first coherent proposal in 1937 for an orbital road round Greater London, at a radial distance of 18 to 20 miles from Charing Cross. World War II put paid to their grand plans, but the route they devised for the South Orbital section in particular is pretty much followed by the M25 today.
1937
CORRECT The Highways Development Survey drawn up by engineer Sir Charles Bressey and his consultant Sir Edwin Lutyens provided the first coherent proposal in 1937 for an orbital road round Greater London, at a radial distance of 18 to 20 miles from Charing Cross. World War II put paid to their grand plans, but the route they devised for the South Orbital section in particular is pretty much followed by the M25 today.
1957
WRONG The Highways Development Survey drawn up by engineer Sir Charles Bressey and his consultant Sir Edwin Lutyens provided the first coherent proposal in 1937 for an orbital road round Greater London, at a radial distance of 18 to 20 miles from Charing Cross. World War II put paid to their grand plans, but the route they devised for the South Orbital section in particular is pretty much followed by the M25 today.
2. Which village is outside the M25 but is still subject to ULEZ?
South Ockendon
WRONG North Ockendon a scattered farming community with labourers’ cottages at its core on Church Lane is the only settlement outside the M25, but within Greater London. Curiously impoverished South Ockendon is not subject to ULEZ.
North Ockendon
CORRECT North Ockendon a scattered farming community with labourers’ cottages at its core on Church Lane is the only settlement outside the M25, but within Greater London. Curiously impoverished South Ockendon is not subject to ULEZ.
Corbets Tey
WRONG North Ockendon a scattered farming community with labourers’ cottages at its core on Church Lane is the only settlement outside the M25, but within Greater London. Curiously impoverished South Ockendon is not subject to ULEZ.
3. How many counties does the M25 pass through?
6
CORRECT The M25 passes through all six of the so-called Home Counties: Kent, Surrey, Berkshire, Buckinghamshire, Hertfordshire and Essex. Most book and website references on the layout of the M25 will tell you that the motorway passes through only five counties, failing as they do to recognise the very short passage across the little bit of Berkshire that manages to infiltrate the circumference just south of J13.
5
WRONG The M25 passes through all six of the so-called Home Counties: Kent, Surrey, Berkshire, Buckinghamshire, Hertfordshire and Essex. Most book and website references on the layout of the M25 will tell you that the motorway passes through only five counties, failing as they do to recognise the very short passage across the little bit of Berkshire that manages to infiltrate the circumference just south of J13.
4
WRONG The M25 passes through all six of the so-called Home Counties: Kent, Surrey, Berkshire, Buckinghamshire, Hertfordshire and Essex. Most book and website references on the layout of the M25 will tell you that the motorway passes through only five counties, failing as they do to recognise the very short passage across the little bit of Berkshire that manages to infiltrate the circumference just south of J13.
4. What M25 themed prize did Chris and Sue Glazier win?
A wedding
CORRECT In 1991 Chris and Sue Glazier won a mystery prize in a local radio competition for couples intent on marriage. The prize was a prepaid wedding, which they were told the night before the ceremony would involve spending their wedding night travelling at 50 mph with their guests being invited to come along for the ride. The wedding the next day at Thurrock Services was followed by a coach trip round the M25, the coach had at least been fitted out with a four-poster bed, and the organisers were sufficiently discreet to drop the guests off after the first of three circuits.
A holiday
WRONG In 1991 Chris and Sue Glazier won a mystery prize in a local radio competition for couples intent on marriage. The prize was a prepaid wedding, which they were told the night before the ceremony would involve spending their wedding night travelling at 50 mph with their guests being invited to come along for the ride. The wedding the next day at Thurrock Services was followed by a coach trip round the M25, the coach had at least been fitted out with a four-poster bed, and the organisers were sufficiently discreet to drop the guests off after the first of three circuits.
A trip of a lifetime
WRONG In 1991 Chris and Sue Glazier won a mystery prize in a local radio competition for couples intent on marriage. The prize was a prepaid wedding, which they were told the night before the ceremony would involve spending their wedding night travelling at 50 mph with their guests being invited to come along for the ride. The wedding the next day at Thurrock Services was followed by a coach trip round the M25, the coach had at least been fitted out with a four-poster bed, and the organisers were sufficiently discreet to drop the guests off after the first of three circuits.
5. What typeface is used on M25 road signs?
Motorway Permanent
CORRECT Motorway Permanent is used on the regular white-on-blue and Motorway Temporary for the black-on-yellow roadwork signs. Designed in 1958 by British graphic designers Jock Kinneir and Margaret Calvert, who also designed many of the pictograms that we are so familiar with, such as the instantly recognisable Men At Work. The designs are so good that there has been no need to change them for over 60 years.
Univers
WRONG Motorway Permanent is used on the regular white-on-blue and Motorway Temporary for the black-on-yellow roadwork signs. Designed in 1958 by British graphic designers Jock Kinneir and Margaret Calvert, who also designed many of the pictograms that we are so familiar with, such as the instantly recognisable Men At Work. The designs are so good that there has been no need to change them for over 60 years.
Gill
WRONG Motorway Permanent is used on the regular white-on-blue and Motorway Temporary for the black-on-yellow roadwork signs. Designed in 1958 by British graphic designers Jock Kinneir and Margaret Calvert, who also designed many of the pictograms that we are so familiar with, such as the instantly recognisable Men At Work. The designs are so good that there has been no need to change them for over 60 years.
6. J8 holds the record for what?
The most southern M25 junction
WRONG This humble junction has a real claim to fame, because it possesses the longest motorway slip road in the country, climbing up Reigate Hill for 1.5 miles, and perhaps surprisingly, the A217 that crosses over it reaches the Fulham Road.
The longest motorway slip road in the country
CORRECT This humble junction has a real claim to fame, because it possesses the longest motorway slip road in the country, climbing up Reigate Hill for 1.5 miles, and perhaps surprisingly, the A217 that crosses over it reaches the Fulham Road.
The M25’s most hazardous junction
WRONG This humble junction has a real claim to fame, because it possesses the longest motorway slip road in the country, climbing up Reigate Hill for 1.5 miles, and perhaps surprisingly, the A217 that crosses over it reaches the Fulham Road.
7. What service station can you cycle to?
Clacket Lane
WRONG South Mimms is unusual in being the only services in Britain linked to the National Cycle Network on Route 12, known as the Great North Way.
Cobham
WRONG South Mimms is unusual in being the only services in Britain linked to the National Cycle Network on Route 12, known as the Great North Way.
South Mimms
CORRECT South Mimms is unusual in being the only services in Britain linked to the National Cycle Network on Route 12, known as the Great North Way.
8. How did Margaret Thatcher officially open the M25?
Cut a ribbon
WRONG At a carefully choreographed ceremony somewhere between J22 and J23, and after a 58-page illustrated brochure to commemorate the opening had been produced, nothing was left to chance, right down to a practice run of the removal of a single cone by an employee of similar build to the prime minister the day before, on 29 October 1986 Thatcher picked up a cone in each hand and symbolically marched them off to the side of the road. The handbag didn’t budge an inch.
Break open a bottle of British sparkling wine
WRONG At a carefully choreographed ceremony somewhere between J22 and J23, and after a 58-page illustrated brochure to commemorate the opening had been produced, nothing was left to chance, right down to a practice run of the removal of a single cone by an employee of similar build to the prime minister the day before, on 29 October 1986 Thatcher picked up a cone in each hand and symbolically marched them off to the side of the road. The handbag didn’t budge an inch.
Moved two traffic cones
CORRECT At a carefully choreographed ceremony somewhere between J22 and J23, and after a 58-page illustrated brochure to commemorate the opening had been produced, nothing was left to chance, right down to a practice run of the removal of a single cone by an employee of similar build to the prime minister the day before, on 29 October 1986 Thatcher picked up a cone in each hand and symbolically marched them off to the side of the road. The handbag didn’t budge an inch.
9. What datum point lies just west of Clacket Lane Services?
The meridian line
CORRECT The Prime Meridian Line is about 1.5 miles west of Clacket Lane Services, when we excitingly travel through time, or at least through the point at which the world’s time begins, returning about halfway between J25 and J26, we re-enter the Eastern Hemisphere of planet earth. Immediately after we do so we will rather appropriately cross from Hertfordshire into Essex, the county of the East Saxons.
The M25’s lowest point
WRONG The Prime Meridian Line is about 1.5 miles west of Clacket Lane Services, when we excitingly travel through time, or at least through the point at which the world’s time begins, returning about halfway between J25 and J26, we re-enter the Eastern Hemisphere of planet earth. Immediately after we do so we will rather appropriately cross from Hertfordshire into Essex, the county of the East Saxons.
Blue driver location signs zero point
WRONG The Prime Meridian Line is about 1.5 miles west of Clacket Lane Services, when we excitingly travel through time, or at least through the point at which the world’s time begins, returning about halfway between J25 and J26, we re-enter the Eastern Hemisphere of planet earth. Immediately after we do so we will rather appropriately cross from Hertfordshire into Essex, the county of the East Saxons.
10. The Bell Common Tunnel changed the fixtures of which sport?
Football
WRONG During the two years it took to construct the tunnel between J26 and J27 by cut-and-cover, the Epping Foresters Cricket Club agreed to play as a wandering club on the understanding that their pitch and pavilion would be reinstated on the same common land above the tunnel once its cutting had been covered over, and that duly happened. It is the English way, after all.
Cricket
CORRECT During the two years it took to construct the tunnel between J26 and J27 by cut-and-cover, the Epping Foresters Cricket Club agreed to play as a wandering club on the understanding that their pitch and pavilion would be reinstated on the same common land above the tunnel once its cutting had been covered over, and that duly happened. It is the English way, after all.
Golf
WRONG During the two years it took to construct the tunnel between J26 and J27 by cut-and-cover, the Epping Foresters Cricket Club agreed to play as a wandering club on the understanding that their pitch and pavilion would be reinstated on the same common land above the tunnel once its cutting had been covered over, and that duly happened. It is the English way, after all.