Takeaway Tales

You can always spot someone from Havering Park: They might be fat, but they have a great haircut. This was the conclusion of a customer of my barber.

The tongue-in-cheek remark had some merit. Once we had a fishmonger, 2 butchers, 3 hardware shops, more grocers you could shake a stick at, 2 greengrocers, chemists, a camera shop, library, jeweller, a plethora of banks and building societies, and even a pet shop.

Now, all we have is a dozen or more hairdressers and takeaways in every available shop unit.

Now thanks to Mercure Hotels we have the definitive list of takeaway names. Obviously, the mega-chains have been excluded: McDonald’s, KFC and Burger King. While some smaller outlets have been creative in finding a punning name: The Codfather, Fishcotheque, Wok-you-like or Nincomsoup, which have not made the list.

The top 10 are rather blander:

1 Charcoal Grill (yes we have one of those)

2 Morley’s (South London based)

3 Best Kebab (yes we also have one of those)

4 Perfect Fried Chicken (another one on our High Street)

5 Munchies

6 Favourite Chicken and Ribs

7 Tops Pizza

8 Chicken Express

9 The Grill

10 Sam’s Chicken (North London based)

2 thoughts on “Takeaway Tales”

  1. Even in nearby tiny Dereham, (population 13,000) we have our share of those.
    The Istanbul. (Turkish eat-in or taleaway)
    Rising Noodle. (Chinese takeaway)
    The Perfect Catch. (Fish and Chips)
    Domino’s Pizza.
    Star Kebabs. (Turkish)
    King’s Burger and Kebabs. (English, Pizza, and Turkish)
    The Chippy. (Traditional fish and chips)
    Small wonder that around 60% of the town’s population are seriously overweight.
    There are two barbers; one English, one Turkish.
    Best wishes, Pete.


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